I am so exhausted of living in fear and constantly abiding by someone else’s rules for MY life.

I’m telling my mom I’m moving out next year. I love my family but sometimes, I can love them better from afar.

"You shouldn’t try to stop everything from happening. Sometimes you’re supposed to feel awkward. Sometimes you’re supposed to be vulnerable in front of people. Sometimes it’s necessary because it’s all part of you getting to the next part of yourself, the next day." Cecelia AhernThe Book of Tomorrow (via hellyeahitsrandom)
"I’m trying to love people because they exist
and not because of what they can do for me."
Emery Allen (via lsd-soaked-tampon)
"My darling, you are allowed to fail without being a failure. You are allowed to make mistakes without becoming one. More opportunities will present themselves, you will find hope again." (via elenayogini)

She was a wildfire.
Illuminating. Leaving
nothing but pain and
destruction on her wake.

But she was beautiful,
and he has fallen,
and he touched her
knowing he would burn.
He caught her embers
and pierced them into
his sternum, where his
heart kept on beating.
She was his wildfire, and
he was her kindling.

"Every single one of us have scars, but we must remember that scars are not wounds; scars are the proof of healing. Just as a surgeon leaves his mark on the sick, Jesus leaves his blood on the broken. Your scars do not define you, His do." h.s. (via heartbeatofatwentysomething)
Hold On We're Going Home (cover) by Vancouver Sleep Clinic
"Be compassionate. Everyone is struggling and the last thing they need is someone judging them and making their fight worse. Spread love." (via edzed)

We parted ways
because I could
choose you and
lose people I love,
or you could
choose me and
lose yourself.

It was too much
to ask from either
of us.



1). Wash your sheets, change your pillow case, wash your blankets. Wash away all the days you’ve spent withering in bed crying. Wash the tears off your pillowcase. Wash away the sad skin cells. Wash away the darkness.

2). Take a shower today. Brush your teeth. Make yourself a good breakfast and remind yourself that you deserve to eat. Dress to impress— yourself. Do whatever makes you feel put together, even if you’re not leaving the house.

3). Water your plants and remind yourself that you love them even though they’re not growing quickly. The same should go for yourself.

4). Feed your pets and remind yourself that there will be no one to love them if you commit suicide. Know that there is no one your cat purrs louder around and there is no one your dog’s face lights up for but you.

5). Return all the things you’ve been meaning to return. Return the clothes that make you feel fat. Return the clothes that make you feel ugly. Return your sick clothes. Throw them away if you need to. Let go if you need to. Cry if you need to and remember why you kept them for so long, but know that it is okay to let them go now. Return your cynicism to the cold boy who taught you it was better to love nothing. Make him feel how warm your heart is now without him.

6). Get new curtains. Close them. Close your eyes. Open them. Pull away the curtains. Let yourself reminded that there may be things in life you can’t control, but how much light enters your room is something you can control. The same can be said for your soul. You decide how much light you let in. You decide how many people you let in. You decide how many people you let help you. You decide how you love and who you love. Let that sink in for a moment.

7). Let yourself float in water. You only drown when you panic. Lie on your back and relax. Even on days when you can’t function, remind yourself that all you have to do is float. As long as you are breathing, you are alive.

5:42 p.m. (To-do list on days I can’t function)
"When she lets you in to the cracks and scars of the past, it’s time to ask a question: do you love her or do you love the idea of her? There is a difference and it’s already past time to know it." h.s.  (via heartbeatofatwentysomething)

I am fire and madness
under your fingertips.
You are silk and honey
under the contours of my own.
We chose love throughout
each other’s iniquities,
stealing glimpses of infinity
between wisps of dawn.

We are our infinity.
We are the seconds,
and the minutes.
We are the hours
and the months.
We are here, together.
We are love well spent.

Saved by His grace.

Hello there, stranger!
Jane. Filipina. Los Angeles, CA

This blog will be mostly about who God is in my life, but I will be posting random stuff as well. You can check my prose and poetry to see who I used to be. But now, I am fierce of lover of Jesus Christ. I draw my strength from His faithfulness, my peace from His love and my identity from His grace.
John 3:30


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